The illuminated mind…..

illuminated mind

“The illuminated mind is beyond all sorrow”. Or Is it? That is indeed a beautiful quote that is frequently bantered around within the new age spiritual movement. Let’s think about that quote. Is any mind beyond all sorrow every moment of every day of every year of our life on this planet? Probably not. But our minds are capable of objectively resetting after loss, wounds or disappointment.

What is an objective reset? I think it starts with understanding the benefit and wonder of joy and love. We should understand that joy and love are felt in your heart but your mind interferes at times. It starts with further understanding that joy and love can be maintained even after a loss or wound. If you experience love and joy within yourself you also process that love is a flow of energy. An energy of joy and love is renewable by having our mind take responsibility for our choices, our mistakes and living our truth as well as the further responsibility to heal ourselves after experiencing loss. The joy and love that comes from allowing mind to follow heart into love and joy allows a state of somewhat perpetual illumination as we objectively reset after loss or pain.

Perhaps that explanation is not necessary for some that may find their way to this blog post…but that simple realization was an epiphany to me. I stumbled into having illumination with that realization. I have learned to reset my mind objectively. I have learned this via paying attention to my heart and helping my mind do the same. I feel brilliantly lucky. I like to share my path to this lucky state of heart and mind illumination – in the hopes that it may be helpful to those that can make the choice to live with joy and love.

My accidental state of illumination came along after I experienced a very dark period. In truth I didn’t see the dark period coming though it is obvious now with my big enlightened mind and heart. I was theoretically entering a wonderful period. I was slender, attractive, successful, cultured, surrounded by “friends”, just dating a man that quickly wanted to offer me the world…it all sounds so wonderful right? How was it the darkest period I was entering?

I was completely unconnected to anything beyond ego, old wounds left unhealed and fear. I seemed happy to others. At times I felt momentarily happy. But moments of happiness were fleeting as I made choice after choice to satisfy the ego that was satisfying old wounds left unhealed that created fear. The harder I worked at resolving my failures by protecting my wounds the more hopeless and dark it felt. The poor choices of ego created a very empty life indeed….giving myself away for little, hiding old wounds and living with fear simply does not allow for love and joy.

It is important to say that I do not blame anyone but myself and I forgave even myself along the way to illumination. (This is a completely necessary task for illumination) If you are walking around with a lifetime of unhealed wounds….you probably will make some mistakes. Life wounds all of us at times…we all have healing to do periodically. I was overdue for the healing. My choices were finally so poor that the healing could not help but be following the darkest moments from that time of sadness. The darkest hour can sometimes be the most important hour if we are willing to embrace change.

I embraced illuminating change.

I left the career after realizing that it all just felt empty and pointless. I left the relationship with an incapable man after one unspeakable fight too many…angry and hurt. I left several empty friendships that took and gave little beyond my ability to say I had “friends”. I took a hiatus from dating and worked at clearing old wounds with understanding of lessons, gratitude for the lessons and released so much pain. I started having such a sense of peace and well being that was swiftly followed by understanding of my connectedness to truth and my heart. This connectedness spread to a greater understanding of self-love’s and unconditional love’s role. In truth “science” repeatedly shows the connectedness of all to everything. My mind was faster to grasp that connection than my heart. But after grasping the concept of universal connection I began to feel a greater sense of love that was beyond myself in my heart. Feeling unconditional universal love was swiftly followed by illumination and the understanding of objective reset that is necessary for maintaining joy and love.

The joy and love I try to maintain is not just for me…it’s for the world that I touch and live within too. If I am connected to all and all is connected to me…why would I hurt anyone with my wounds or pain? Why would I not want everything that is to experience my love and joy? Just imagine what illuminated minds could do for the state of mankind today. What would our world become? It would not be war, it would not be sorrow and it would not be grief. It would become love.

The simple light that comes from complicated darkness is love.


You may say I’m a dreamer….but I’m not the only one….


I heard the John Lennon song “Imagine” this evening.

The wars and conflicts in this world are mighty. We humans seem bound to continue our race to use all the earths tentative resources and leave nothing for future generations. We seem to think we can continue our old outworn ways of living at any cost but never bear the cost.

Many years later….The words of John Lennon’s song “Imagine” echoed in my heart this evening. He sang us words that were so simple and beautiful yet seemingly so unattainable these many decades later…a song of peace amongst men. He wasn’t talking about one way of government or religion above another. He was singing a poem that dared us to believe that we could unite as one. He was a dreamer. He wasn’t the only one. I’m a dreamer too.

I can try to convince anyone that reads this blog of the truth of his words…but maybe John did it best. No rewording is really necessary.

Imagine there’s no heaven
It’s easy if you try
No hell below us
Above us only sky
Imagine all the people
Living for today…

Imagine there’s no countries
It isn’t hard to do
Nothing to kill or die for
And no religion too
Imagine all the people
Living life in peace…

You may say I’m a dreamer
But I’m not the only one
I hope someday you’ll join us
And the world will be as one

Imagine no possessions
I wonder if you can
No need for greed or hunger
A brotherhood of man
Imagine all the people
Sharing all the world…

You may say I’m a dreamer
But I’m not the only one
I hope someday you’ll join us
And the world will live as one

Let’s hope the world can understand how to live as one….a brotherhood of man….sharing all the world. Peace at last.

The simple light that comes from complicated darkness is oneness

Animal Totems in my hair…Animal totems everywhere….

Animal totem blog picI was recently talking to a friend about animal totems and the spiritual messages and signs that nature provides.

That conversation became the inspiration for this blog. It was a thought provoking conversation between two spiritual people. We talked about how many cultures have been more open to seeing animals as messengers for source/spirit/god/supernatural energy. We discussed some of the ways that we have individually felt a tug of knowing that something was a “sign”. We even discussed some of the powerful and affirming animal totem experiences that have appeared in our own lives.

By the way – It is still sometimes hard for me to type out sentences like that last one. The spiritual world is new to me. I am a “scientific spiritualist”. It is science and archaeology that has convinced me that things such as energy healing, connection to a universal source of energy, heart energy, animal totems, power of intention and manifestation really are part of this beautiful connected universe. I found my spiritual connection in my mind first and then my heart. I am still finding my way but it has been a beautiful journey. As I am so joyful, connected and happy….I hope that this blog I am writing helps people that are searching for their own connection.

But back to that inspiring discussion around animal totems…Perhaps it will be useful to outline some very interesting and provoking history of totems or “signs” found within our ever evolving species. Some of the oldest totemic symbolism has been found within the Sanxingdui Culture in southern China. Chinese transliterates totem as tuteng (圖騰). Sanxingdui bronze masks and heads (radiocarbon dated circa 1200BCE) appear to have been mounted on wooden poles. Some scholars have suggested that totemic culture spread from ancient Asian populations to the rest of the world. Others conclude that totemism arose separately in numerous cultures; totemic cultures in North America are estimated to have been more than 10,000 years old. Continents appear to have uniformly found their way to honoring animals. North and South American Native Indian tribes, Himalayan/Tibetan, European, Middle Eastern and African cultures have left artifacts that honor animal energies. We find that honor of animal energy archaeologically in coats of arms, totem beads, totem poles and other unmistakable monolithic carvings and drawings.

If totemism arose separately in numerous cultures, which it appears to have….why? Was there a connection between animal and man that was deeper in a simpler time? Was there a time that we understood a bit more connection and energy within the universe? When we placed ourselves above the natural world and animals became mere domesticated or wild beasts…did we lose something?

The modern new age take on totems is also fascinating. breaks down various archetypal energy meanings of animals. Quoted from the website introduction “Following the footsteps of many traditions from all around the world, and based on modern principles of psychology and intuitive work, its goal is to present information in a format that is easy to read for anyone curious about the world of spirit or power animals. At the same time, it also intends to convey the deeper, mystical, and spiritual meanings associated with the animals and our relationship to them as spirit guides and totems. In many traditions, our relationship with the spirit of animals is a reminder that all life is sacred. From the dawn of times, humankind had a relationship with animals, not just in the physical realms, but also in the spiritual ones.”

Should we continue to assume that all of these cultures (modern new age or ancient) are mistaken in paying attention to archetypal energies within nature? These many various cultures identified, validated and associated certain animals with certain energies which became influences which became part of their way of flowing through life. Were the ancient cultures ignorant? Is the modern new age culture mistaken? Are we, as the new cultural majority, ignorant of something that was lost? How does a totem pole provide a clue to something of value in this winter day in February, 2014?

Some personal examples that I hope will be helpful –

Let’s start with the crow – messenger of transformation, death, rebirth and sometimes even trickery. You perhaps watched the movie “The Crow”. The clever crow is one of the better known totem energies thanks to popular culture. It only takes a few google clicks to find fairly remarkable everyday occurrences of crows gathering outside the windows of the dying. Why? Crows are the smartest of the bird kingdom but why would they possibly have such a frequent gathering around souls passing? Why do we feel intrigue or some deeper meaning by this black feathered bird in particular? Why do crows appear at times of transformation?

How did crows signify something relevant in my own life?

In the worst days of a dysfunctional relationship from my past – the crows appeared. I knew that my choice to be in this relationship was a poor one. I knew that I was struggling to live in my truth as long as I stayed in that relationship. I often spent hours a day wondering how I had allowed myself to be with someone that was so incapable. I felt stuck. I knew I should go but I didn’t want to acknowledge that the relationship had been so harmful and utterly foolish. Crows started to appear outside the bedroom window at night. First a single crow appeared on a branch on a rainy evening. This crow was joined by another crow and then more crows as the weeks went on. Eventually 8 to 10 crows were staring in the windows some evenings. They would perch on the branches of the tree looking into the windows. Some nights it would become so eerie that I would close the curtains. If I looked out the window they remained in their perches looking in as though they could see something even through the curtains. As weeks went on the crows became more openly present and difficult to ignore. Crows would land on fences near the park that I walked through. They would caw loudly and drop sticks as I walked through a local college campus. They would perch across the condo courtyard and caw loudly as I sat on the deck drinking a glass of wine pretending all was well. The crows would even hop along a power line on a busy intersection toward the last days of this “death and rebirth” that needed to occur. More interestingly as I left the relationship and moved into healing the crows disappeared. They followed me to my new home but then as my healing began in earnest they just simply stopped appearing in my everyday life.

Then came the dead birds on sidewalks. I have lived in downtown Chicago for over 11 years now. I rarely saw dead birds. I had encountered a mere one or two dead birds in a ten year span. Last spring, as I faced leaving my business career behind and embracing a spiritual career…dead birds began to occasionally appear along the busy city street that I would walk along each day. In the first occurrence the bird appeared to have just died. Its feathers were so beautiful. It looked as though it had stopped breathing moments before I almost stepped on it. I looked around to see if there were any open windows. It looked like a bird that had been a pet. I wondered if it fell or flew out of one of the surrounding lofts. It seemed like such a waste of life. I have to admit that I felt a tug of something personal when I looked down at that first dead bird. A second dead bird (similar in appearance to the first) showed up a few day’s later. It caught my attention in that it was so odd. When the third dead bird showed up the very next day…. I turned to trusty google.

As I sat down in front of my computer I truthfully assumed that the Chicagoland area had perhaps been contaminated with some pollutant that was harming the birdlife. Surely there was some news coverage? No such contamination was found online however a very interesting “animal sign” blog with thousands of blog comments did surface. The blog outlined that finding dead birds was often accompanied by leaving an old outdated way of life behind and the need to embrace a new way of living. There were more than a few posts about finding dead birds. There were thousands of posts on this site…all posts from people that were instinctively realizing that finding a dead bird represented something more than finding a dead bird. The comments uniformly echoed some time of life change. I could understand the personal symbolism in the type of bird that I found dead and where I found the birds. The birds continued to show up periodically every few weeks all summer long. Always these wasted lives were lying somewhere on a sidewalk and always along the street I walked and lived on. Inevitably the appeared as my thoughts churned around making a spiritual career change…always as I was coming and going in a bit of a lost way.

As I made my way into my new career the birds simply stopped being found on my daily path. I am in a spiritual career now. You probably know that from the type of subjects I discuss in these blogs if you are reading this at this moment. No more crows, dead birds on my path or spiders (an altogether fascinating tale that is completely personal) however I do see other things at times that catch my attention. It is something that I pay more attention to now. I am not suggesting people walk around finding meaning in every little bit of the animal and insect kingdom. But when something unusual occurs with an animal totem energy and it catches my attention I now recognize the tug of “a sign”.

That “tug” of knowing….it is what I think our ancestors recognized. I think they recognized many energies that we no longer understand. Perhaps the knowledge is something that we should seek rather than assuming that the cultures that honored animal energies, totems, signs and meanings were ignorant. Isn’t it possible that something was lost along the way as our modern culture detached itself from the natural world and rushed into the industrialized world? Isn’t it possible that there was a time that we understood energy in a completely different way? Perhaps man’s journey isn’t just to the frontier of industry and progress. Perhaps our journey should include a quest for some of the natural knowledge we discarded along our way to today. Perhaps we should reconsider what those ancient cultures tried to teach us?

“You are part of everything! You are part of the fire, you are part of the water, you are part of the green, you are part of the stars, and you are related to everything. You are related to the stones, to the trees, to the fish, to the creepy-crawlers, to the ones that fly, to the ones that walk on all fours, and to the ones that walk on two legs. Everything is sacred and, therefore, you are sacred too. That’s what we mean when we say, Mitakuye oyasin.” Wallace Black Elk, Sicangu Lakota Spiritual Elder

Further explanation of spirit animal totems –

The simple light that comes from the complicated darkness begins with the awareness that everything is connected.

To tie the quantum knot…or knot


I was watching the snowflakes outside my window today….

As I watched the little particles float through the wintry day I watched the energy that flows through the universe dancing in front of the window pane.  Beautiful little knots of water frozen in patterns of tiny beauty danced around the parking lot and through the air in a thick white cloud.  I thought of the scientifically expressed energy that binds everything in this universe together in beautiful complicated knots. That snowflake dancing outside the window was such a beautiful expression of the science. 

There is a scientific theory that embraces energetic knots at a sub atomic level. I only know a little of the theory.  I was a corporate treasurer when I used my mind to earn a living…rather than my heart as I do today. Therefore I studied complicated foreign exchange and interest movements….and not the science of the simple elegant energy knot.  What a beautiful ancient theory the scientific physicist has to study when the idea of energy knots is put forth.  Energy does tie itself into knots.  Endlessly, beautifully, over and over again energy knits itself together to create the fabric of the universe, our world, our bodies, our cells, our very DNA, our quarks and our individual vibrations in the entire beautiful knot. 

Modern theory, and modern minds are not to first to find beauty in the concept of an energy knot.  There are beautiful ancient knots featured in remnants of previous thinking cultures.  We find elaborate knots in Tibetan scrolls.  Celtic monks covered pages and pages of their texts with complicated connected knots.  Egyptian artifacts contain patterns of connected knots.  What idea were these ancient scholars really trying to convey?  Was the idea of the simple knot something that we intuited even before modern man created the science to absorb how interconnected all energy is at a quantum level?

I like to think so.

I like to think that we all tie knots in this big ever replicating universe we inhabit.  We tie energy knots with our thoughts, our words and our actions.  Our energy creation is the most basic expression of a knot.  If the tiniest bit within the atom that can be measured (the quark) knots itself into an unbreakable knot (it does) and can be moved by our very expectations statistically (it does)…..what is our energy tying together?  What are you creating? 

I like to think of my heart as the creator for my day now.  Actually, I feel that our hearts are the creators for our worlds.   I keep mine open and send love into the battered world that we live within.  It is a hard time to be human. 

So much of what we have created in this physical world is ego driven and unsustainable. Some of the things we have created are beautiful.    I like living in a warm home in a safe country that guarantees my freedom to dream. I can sit around tying knots of thoughts all day because I am American and that is my guaranteed right.  I have the constitutional right to dream and pursue happiness.   But what should change so that the entire world may be safely living in the way that I do?  How do we create a better world?  What do we do differently?  What do we create by not doing things differently?  How can the beautiful knot of freedom be sustained?  How can the world of humanity be sustainable in what knots we tie together?

On a personal level, the energy knot between two people is also likely to be unsustainable these days.  So many challenges to the human heart and its connective ability to tie energy with others.   Some individuals continue relating on a personal level and creating beautiful energy knots that become moments, that become days that become lives. They are the lucky ones that think with their hearts and minds and create love in their families, their friendships and their lives.

But so much is broken in the ability to create energy knots in our relationships.  Texting, emailing, distracting self prevents so much of the emotional energy knots that have been tied between two people in any personal relationship through the ages.  We breakup without even speaking in the same physical space.  It is now unacceptably acceptable to breakup via text, facebook, email.  It is truly sad if we consider that for just a moment.  It is acceptable to give no energy at all beyond the moment we text an ending from afar with simple electronic words conveying a remote energy that we feel is sufficient to untie a knot.  How can a knot that was so easy to untie be meaningful?  It isn’t.  It’s painless because it was worthless. Nothing was created and nothing was lost.  That broken relationship was merely a distraction on the way to understanding the need to tie more meaningful knots.

Though the times are challenging for heart knotters….I am hopeful.  We all understand the difference in something that moves us and something that leaves us feeling empty.  We all instinctively turn to the sun.  We all instinctively turn to love.  We will get it right as time goes on.  Energy knotting is beautiful when it is meaningful. 

What knots are you tying today?  Are they knots that were worth tying with your energy?  Are they sustainable?  Do they move you and the people that surround you to the greatest highest good of a situation? 

Watch the snowflakes bouncing around your window for a bit.  Those thoughts you create from your heart are just as beautiful and just as meaningful.  A snowflake becomes a drift which becomes a pile which melts and becomes a torrent.  Tie your thoughts meaningfully and as the heart will and you will create beauty.

The simple light that comes from complicated darkness is the energy we tie our thoughts with and that energy is love.


All you need is love….



It is Valentines day today.  I’m single.  I’m in love with love and it is wonderful!

But Valentines day isn’t wonderful to everyone….such an expectation and sometimes such specific limitation.  To so many of us it means “Romance!” with the capital R and exclamation point included!  To others it represents red roses, pretty cards, boxes of candy, eating out, expectations, big nights with lingerie dreams, sighs, tears and hopes.  Such pressure in the world accompanies this day of love.

I thought about what love means to me today as a human and as a soul.

I got to my thought of what love is by thinking first of what it isn’t.  There were unpleasant words that I associated with what love isn’t. Love isn’t hurtful, selfish, self centered, power over another, transient emotion, cruelty, jealousy, possessiveness, withholding, based on insecurities, manipulation, ego serving, envious, wistfulness, restrictive, unrealistic, practicality, draining, justifications, lies, convenient, bargaining, clinginess or betrayal. These are words we use when something less than love has fallen apart and we are trying to explain the drama that occurred in our lives.  Perhaps our hearts were battered or perhaps we battered another heart.  We even say love is a battlefield though it isn’t. We use these unpleasant words or battle phrases to explain why we are leaving a love situation.  But truth is that if these words are used the situation was likely not love.  It was a situation serving a wound.

Let’s talk about what love is in truth.  Love is caring, supporting, unselfish, giving with no thought of receiving, freedom, fulfilling, pleasure at no expense to the other, security, generosity, laughter, light, hopefulness, gratitude, beauty, lack of restriction, flowing,  feeling joy and giving joy.  These are the words that describe the emotions and state of actual love.  These words are beautiful.  Who wouldn’t want the things that come with the actual energy of love. We are serving our hearts when these words are being used to describe a feeling, person or situation.

One is not the same as the other though the two situations – serving our wounds (not love) and serving our hearts (love) – are often confused. If you are serving your wounds you look for love from people that serve your wounds.  They are willing to serve wounds as they are wounded themselves. If you are serving your heart you are happy creating love.

How do we know the difference? You know the difference by how a situation makes you feel.  If you are feeling bad you are serving your wounds.  If you are joyful you are serving your heart.  We need to heal our wounds in order to stop serving them.  Then we need to serve our heart.  Not just in romantic “Valentines” day love….but beyond that.  In this world, in this moment in this life we are living we need to let our heart fill with love as often as possible.  Truth is that all we need is love.  If we feel love we live in joy no matter the circumstances.

I would wish for people to heal their wounds by finding all the love they need within themselves on this Valentines day celebrating love.  We don’t need anyone to feel the love that is.  We can create love anytime we need it.  Bake a cake for a friend and feel the love.  Help someone on the subway and feel the love.  Cook meals for the homeless and feel the love.  Give your friend a hug and feel the love.  Walk outside and look at the sky and feel love.  Look at yourself in the mirror and see how wonderful you are.  Keep looking until you see it and know that you deserve love and you are love. 

If you need some inspiration to start finding love in this big beautiful world – a song from the past that rings true for all time. (Click to the youtube link with one extra click to satisfy copyrights).

Happy Valentines Day World! I love you!

The simple light that comes from complicated darkness is love….

The magical inspiration of humans



Along with many on this tiny planet….I was watching the Olympic competitions yesterday evening.  I starting thinking about what inspired the athletes. What moment occurred to set the athlete up for the hard work and endurance that is required to make it to the Olympic field?

As I watched the Olympic skaters flow with beauty I understood why little children start leaping around the room after watching figure skaters on television.  I understood why a little mind would be inspired to replicate the beauty of an athletes hard earned grace.  I understood as I was once a tiny child “skating” around my family living room in my socks. It felt magical. I didn’t try to ice skate but other inspirations came along and I did try for much in this life I have led.

Some children will find their courage to chase their own inspiration from seeing dreams come true on the Olympic field. Think for a moment of the many tiny bodies all over the planet echoing what they observed as they found inspiration in the Olympic grace of ice skating. How many of those tiny souls will feel that they too will accomplish much as they watch other humans chasing an inspiration?

As the competition unfolded the athletes excelled, some fell down, some faced defeat and other achieved triumph. I felt as though all of humanity were part of their accomplishment or defeat for the few moments they graced the world stage.  As they created beauty with their physical form I could merely watch spellbound and with complete connection to their every move. 

Many things cause humans to take action for something greater than their individual moments. Greed, Fear, Jealousy, Love, Protection, Loss, or Desire are just a few things that motivate humans to action. Of the many feelings we have I would say that inspiration is very powerful. How can I not as I watch the Olympics? I thought of the journey through life that the young skater had taken.  How many bruises from falls?  How many sore muscles?  How many early morning practices and falling into bed exhausted with no time to do simple young things.  What had inspired that skater?  What had inspired him so beautifully that his movements became inspiration for an entire world audience yesterday evening?  

What exactly is inspiration? I feel it is the idea that catches our attention and inspires us to be different than we were before the idea.  It is essential for the human condition to move forward.  Some will inspire with art.  Some will inspire with scientific discovery.  Some will inspire with athletic excellence.  Some will inspire with kindness and grace. 

And so the obvious question followed…..What have I inspired or can inspire?  I will take that question further?  What are you inspiring in those around you?  Is it light?  Is it love? Does it move the human condition forward?  It is truth that on this tiny planet we have choices and one choice is to be inspired or to remain empty. We can create inspiration or we can stay in the dark.  What choices are you making that are from inspiration?  What other choices even matter?

More on inspiration in this video – (You may want to watch it more than once…..)

The simple light that comes from complicated darkness is inspiration

Fibonacci throws us a curve….of infinite possibility


Do you know of the golden spiral? The curve that appears to be the law in nature? The Fibonacci curve is a mathematical principle that has been shown to illustrate the law of natural form. It is found in everything. It illustrates the very movement of the arms of our galaxy as well as the lovely curve of the tiniest seashell. It is ever present. It is ever expanding.

A bit more of the science of this principle – (I suggest you click on this after reading the entire blog.)

A bit more of the beauty of this principle – (I suggest you click on this now!)

I love thinking about the Fibonacci curve. I love thinking of the possibilities of infinite creation. If we can accept that life mirrors the Fibonacci curve (which mathematically seems to be true) then we must accept that the creation of life is as infinite as the mathematical result underpinning the concept.

Imagine for a moment that all of life is made of light (which is also proven to be so) and that the electrical impulses of our thoughts too follow the form of a Fibonacci curve. We start with the kernel of electrical impulse of a thought. It spreads through our brain as an impulse of thought and transforms to word(s) into something that is heard and understood by others. The thought can be translated into electronic form and put into the great collective consciousness of the internet as my words to you are being written in this moment. It can spread and move through cyberspace into your thought process as you read my words. It can spread and move through the world as our thoughts become words that become conversations that become decisions that become habits that become cultures that become societies.

Watch your thoughts, watch your Fibonacci curves of creation and watch your light spread through this beautiful universe of infinite possibility.

The simple light that comes from the complicated darkness of man is the truth of words and numbers